Tag Archives: potty mouth

Starts With B, Rhymes With Witch

Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.

What do you get when one and three go to war? Lot’s of flying fists, hurt feelings and exhausted referees.

Into every new year a little profanity must fall and who better to give it to you than Il Duce? The shock value of naughty words spilling forth from tiny lips never lessens, but  even I drew a sharp breath upon hearing his newly acquired profane utterance. 

If you want an extreme reaction, make sure to call me a bitch. 

If you want to make me cry watch my five-year old learn and use that word. 

Number one and number three are forces of nature that suck the air out of every room they enter creating a vacuum that few escape. Sandwiched between these two is my gentle sweet heart who has learned to weather the storm and keep his head down. 

Powerful personalities battle it out over Tokyo

Today I listened to all three call each other that word and waited for the piss poor parenting paddy wagon to pull up and cart me off. 

Good work mom. 

One too many viewings of the housewives of whatever county happen to be on and the word became legend over here where potty mouth is far too prevalent and three bars of lye soap are in demand now. 

Little assholes.



Filed under 1, am I doing anything right?, assholes, Bad cable shows, bad catholics, bad parenting, behavior problems in kids, buffoonery, crazy ramblings, discipline, kids and parenting, kids that like cursewords, parenting, parenting badly, please let him grow up to be normal

F is For Fun!

Here’s a question for you. What do you do if one of your kids suffers from a chronic case of potty mouth? Soap? Time out? Throw your shoe in a fit of rage? I’ve gotten past the point where I pretend to be aghast and make a spectacular attempt at show parenting. “My heavens”! I would exclaim with mock surprise. Then I would shake my head and commiserate with the parents witnessing this spectacle.”He must have heard that from Johnny Smith, you KNOW what a filthy mouth that heathen has”. So when I look at things now, sometimes I see them bathed in a new light. The light of someone who’s kid exclaimed last week that “It’s so freaking hot out here, our asses are burning RIGHT OFF!” when the class spent the afternoon on the outdoor playground during a spell of unseasonably warm weather.
Imagine my quandary then, when I read the phonics letter that the fours class will be covering next week. F. Yes, the letter f starts so many wonderful words, fun, frolic, fish, fancy, but I am 100% positive that I already know the word my son will offer up when they go around the circle and ask with naive glee “do YOU know an f word?”

You KNOW I'm going to say it.

You KNOW I'm going to say it.

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Filed under foul language in preschool, kids with potty mouth