First off, I’d like to apologize for the lack of new content and my nonchalant attitude toward the whole thing. I have remained completely inert both physically and mentally for nearly a month now minus one whirlwind trip into New York City that got the grease in my wheels turning fast enough so that I could become the victim of one well placed roofie in my Hot Tranny Mess cocktail.
Don’t try to convince me otherwise. I was drugged.
I’m really hoping you will understand and take consolation in the fact that this entry is only a few paragraphs long and won’t waste your valuable summer moments that you’d rather be spending by the pool in the company of flesh and blood humans.
So in a nutshell, here’s how it happens.
I stare blankly into the glowing warmth of my large monitor and then decide I’m better off going upstairs with the Soft Scrub (with bleach!) to gently buff away the grout stains in my shower.
While the more industrious of my friends are able to toss off post after whimsical post about life,love and the pursuit of happiness, I appear to be in no hurry at all!
As the summer chugs onward I’m hoping to come in a little more often from the outdoors and sit in the cool, air-conditioned embrace of the area surrounding my laptop even though I was just becoming comfortable with my reputation as a slacker with no follow through.
Since losing my urge to do anything related to the use of a keyboard, I’ve become well acquainted with these kids that live here and have mastered the deceptively terrifying skill set for using the “Dyson”. My cleaning woman is still the champion on that front but I find myself slowly catching up.
And so these are a quiet few moments before I break the case of the missing grandfather clock wide open Nancy Drew style or confront the Japanese government with the proof that they have been purposely ignoring my requests to be the first in line for that cloned Mammoth project they’ve got under wraps, so let’s just enjoy the silence.