Despite what you may have heard, the rumours of my death have been greatly exaggerated.
That does NOT mean however that things are going swimmingly over here, in fact we are a fucking mess. And that is putting it mildly.
We’ve been blasted with furious hammer blows from the bad luck mallet.
First, I managed to enter the bad parenting Guinness book after joking with my child that she should stop making that silly face because she looks like she’s got Bell’s Palsy.
Well guess what?!
She actually does.
Yeah, I know, I know. Good job!
Anyway, we got an extra special surprise when we were informed that we would have to go to neurologists who never have any available appointments and specialists and people who like to stick big needles in your arm to suck out all of your available blood, blah blah blah.
THEN just as we were coming out of that bend in the road our massive, powerful full of life dog just up and died, right out of the blue.
This creature, who had been moving like a freight train hours before he was felled, crumpled in a lifeless heap and stopped responding.
We are destroyed.
Was this dog a huge pain in the ass?
Did he knock over children, adults, furniture and lamps?
Still, he was gorgeous and sweet and loyal and we miss him horribly.
Sure I know that things like this happen and that we need to keep on keepin on but I find myself without anything silly or bizarre to say to you today.
So I will sum up by telling you that my daughter is on the mend and seems to have none of the terrifying things we imagined might be causing her facial paralysis (phew) and showing you a photo of my slobbery fool of a doggy.
See ya big fella, you will be missed:(