O.K. I’m ready.
My bags are packed and the thermostat is set at an energy-efficient 68 degrees.
There is enough food in the house to take care of all the heathens left behind and a Pat Boone cd playing on a continuous loop over the sound system to help everyone reflect on the reasons they aren’t coming along.
Whatever it is you hell-hounds will be doing after I’ve been sucked up by the lords holy Hoover it is no more concern of mine.
Sadly, as optimistic as I sound I’m pretty much resigned to the fact that I’ll be hanging out here with everyone else come Rapture Saturday so let’s get out our party planners and throw a Sodom & Gomorrah themed bash that would make Jesus proud!
**Thanks to this person for the best picture of people being sucked into the sky that I’ve ever seen. Seriously.**