This is the Sound Life Makes

Cave dwelling, while frowned upon as a lifestyle choice, can be a refreshing change.

 

A big resounding thud.

I’ve been face down in the wet sand unable to move an inch for weeks.

My computer blew up and I’ve been living in a cave, crouched like a feral animal with my iPhone nestled securely in my bosom, trying to stay connected to the world outside my imaginary cube.

I met a boy raised by wolves and did battle with several rabid foxes but even with all that excitement I’ve felt oddly disconnected and a little off kilter.

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13 Comments

Filed under good bye old friend, i'm getting twitchy trying to type on my iphone, my computer blew up

13 responses to “This is the Sound Life Makes

  1. Tom G.

    You’re alive! I was beginning to think you had fallen into a well like Baby Jessica, or Keeping You Awake!

    I should have guess it was just good old fashioned cave living, what with the woolly mammoths and fur bikini.

    • dufmanno

      I have spotted Keeping You Awake skittering through the forest with his demented monkey.
      If I can just get him away from that animal long enough to get a few words in edgewise I might be able to get him to return to us.
      Fucking monkey.

  2. those foxes are always starting stuff. hope you get the machine fixed soon.

    PS – The don ho version of shock the monkey kills

    • dufmanno

      Foxes are deceptively cute but once I saw a video of a man fending off a rabid fox with only his wits and a loaf of Wonder Bread I changed my mind forever.
      Your big wet brown eyes and luxurious red coat aren’t enough to lull me into a false sense of security ANY MORE!
      Also, Don Ho really did a version of Shock the Monkey?
      That is awesome

  3. I just assumed you were off with a famous artist sitting for your building-sized wooly mammoth portrait.

    • dufmanno

      Well, I did that too but it didn’t come out like I wanted so I had him scrap it and start from scratch.
      I hate it when they paint me with thick ankles. I want DAINTY ankles.

  4. i hear ya sista. i felt like this the days before the cable was connected and my new pc arrived at the apt. i actually had the DTs which i mistook for the franzia shakes kinda like nicholas cage in leaving las vegas.

    • dufmanno

      I had withdrawal so bad I was actually outside watching bird behavior and thinking it would be of interest to the rest of the world. (see bluejay post).
      I’m all “what the fuck is WRONG with these birds! How can they get away with this!!”
      Sad part is no one really cares about these things.
      I’m glad you’re all set up now because even though absence makes the heart grow fonder I still miss getting hit between the eyes with your prose.
      Rock on.

  5. Cave living, although dark and dank, can be a surprisingly smart way to live. Why, just today I plugged into the world and learned that Prince William got married to some “commoner” named Kate. Apparently 2 billion people not only knew this but were up at 5am watching the nuptials take place on television. Now I ask you, who’s more intelligent? The person under the rock, getting their zzzs or the person glued to the tube with circles under their eyes?

    • dufmanno

      I only did this in the ’80s to see Charles and Di wed because we had a “ROYAL SLUMBER PARTY” where the objective was to stay awake all night to watch the spectacle.
      My friend had a nighmarishly spinster like older sister who forced us all to sit in a semi circle and wait with her to watch what was obviously going to be the crowning glory of her small sad life.
      She had Charles and Di commemorative plates, shirts, buttons and other useless junk strewn EVERYWHERE.
      Chick was totally unhinged.
      Finally, after the nuptuals, we were allowed to retreat to my friends rainbow themed room to go to bed.

  6. dbs

    I once battled with a fox. The whole thing was on surveillance video. Don’t. Even. Kid.
    P.S. I enjoy your off kilter-ness.

    • dufmanno

      I bow down to anyone who has done battle with the mighty fox. If you can’t get your hands on that video a crudely drawn cartoon illustrating your fight to the death will suffice.
      You can ramp it up with blood and guts if you like!

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