Sunday, in my mind, is still the anxiety laden buffer day for the much beloved Friday and Saturday. It protects them from the bleak horror of Monday- the most dreaded day of the week.
Most people would probably sigh after reading that and suggest I use my Sunday to better understand when to use a dash or semi-colon and while I’m at it look into how to end a run on sentence and avoid a dangling modifier.
Well fuck that. Stupid is as stupid does people and I am both lazy AND stupid so you need to come to grips with that.
I just had what might be the laziest Sunday on record for a human being.
My low achievement scores were helped by an 11:30 wake up time, an omlet and bacon breakfast served to me by my husband and a half hour staring marathon where I watched several increasingly terrifying types of bees go to war on the back porch.
I lifted myself one rung above the mighty tree sloth by managing to take three photographs and then subsequently maul them in the least artistic way possible on Photoshop. And then I went for the bronze by actually going grocery shopping.
I am happy to report to the world that the toilet paper crisis of 2010 is now officially over and our family is no longer foraging outside for random bits of stray used napkin or soft leaves to tide us over.
Is that the combined sound of thunderous applause and retching I hear?