Our old friend is back, and she’s as incredibly fierce as she was during her first couple of appearances. This time the hysteria that rides on the hem of her skirt (or perhaps her coat tails) is all consuming and terrifying. She made her first much talked about debut in the trenches alongside all those dashing men in uniform around 1918 or so making a spectacular jump across the species barrier and into the history books. This time the pandemic team and the CDC specialists at the influenza labs were ready and waiting and guess what? She can’t knock em’ dead like she used to.
Seriously folks, I have spent the better part of a week quarantined in my home due to an incredibly unlucky staffer at my children’s school contracting a seemingly mild case of “swine flu”. This soon to be pariah, had the misfortune of ignoring her symptoms and spending some quality time with the kiddies before realizing that maybe she had made a mistake of epic proportions. Whoops. We turned on the news to see “DC School Closed” splashed across the front page accompanied by an ominous photo of our little school in the dark of night with a giant white sign saying “SCHOOL CLOSED”. It was scrawled in blood red for added effect and looked to have been written by someone dying of the virus who crawled off after their last heroic deed (warning the innocent children) and perished in a nearby shrub. I wouldn’t be surprised to see the marker they used (having slipped from their death grip) laying halfway between the sign and the poor deceased schmuck.
So here we are on lockdown, three kids gone mad with boredom and one mom about to cross over into Jack Torrance territory. There are only so many I Spy games, watercolor paintings, piggyback rides cartoon watching that one family can do. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.